I just couldn't wait to put my shorts on...
God I love when the weather breaks. I love when we have 10 days of freezing cold and all I can think about is wearing my cargo shorts again. My calves are so bulging. My tight white socks and sneakers only emphasize how often I hit the gym to work out my calf muslces. When the weather breaks like this, man I make up excuses to go to the grocery store wearing my cargo shorts. I love when everyone looks at my calves and cargo shorts. I usually hold out until the first blizzard, or sometimes even untill the 2nd blizzard before I pack the cargo shorts away. All I can think about when I'm buying my cargo shorts from Kohl's is, "God, my bulging calf muscles will look so big in the winter." I just can't wait until the weather breaks again, like 50 degress so I can drive with my windows down smoking cigarettes in my shorts. I'm hoping to buy a 89 Chrysler LeBaron convertible in the next day or so. Rolling the window down doesn't do it's justice to my sweet new terminator sunglasses. In the dark, foggy, inside, it doesn't matter.
God I love Cleveland Weather.
posted by CBrownsfan365 at 8:26 AM
2 Comments:
No, no, my friend....I see your bulging calf muscles in cargo shorts and up you a fat chick with her belly busting out of a shirt that is way too short. When I think of the beautiful, ever changing Cleveland climate, the first thing that comes to mind is scantily clad, robust women. Tower City, Geauga Lake, and the buffet line at Ponderosa are just a few places you can spot these half-top hotties. I mean c'mon...what are you trying to prove? Three or four sizes ago you might have been able to pull it off, but I think its time to retire that shirt, along with any Daisy Dukes you might have hiding in the bottom of your drawer. I can't wait until that first barely warm day when I can scope out some under-dressed, large, luscious ladies. I know big girls need loving too, but know your limitations and we can all enjoy the tropical 50 degree weather before it snows again.
Wearing my cargo's when it's 34+ degrees is my GOD DAMNED RIGHT YOU F*CKING SISSY!! If you think you are so man then come on down to the McDonald's parking lot off route 29 in McMannnusburg. I'll be in my stonewashed cuttoffs drinking in my TransAm.
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